Back to the Basics: Discover your Why

Today's blog post is going to be different from the content that I normally share. I always share my design experiences here but this time I am going to relate it to my personal experience. Surprisingly, planning a wedding and planning a design project are similar: the vision, the stress, the planning, the investment, and the outcome. When we find ourself in one of these situations, typically they are both big life changes and large decisions need to be made.. and there's a timeline.

As I plan my wedding (which we are still figuring out who/what/where/when), I originally said "I want a small intimate wedding that is unique!"  I declared it to be true and went on to pursue it. I knew I didn't want to have it at a typical wedding hall. I was looking for architecture, charm, and venues with grit.

So often we get hung up on the idea of how everything should be that sometimes we lose sight of the thing that we actually wanted in the first place.

This is where it starts.

You have this amazing vision in your mind of how you want your home/wedding should look like. With excitement, you race to tell your closest friend or family member. They give you feedback including the good, bad, and the ugly.

Since this person plays an important role in your life, you take their opinions into consideration. All of a sudden, your original vision gets buried under someone else's, and your idea slowly gets pushed to the back burner.

After telling your Mother, Best friend, Grandparents, your cousins, your boss, your neighbor and their little pet dog too.... your idea of your dream wedding/home transforms into something totally different.

When you are planning your dream home or in my case, a wedding.. it is SO EASY to lose sight of what you truly desire. Ideas get blown out of proportion and suddenly your budget of $20,000 turns into $40,000.. After asking everyone else for their opinion, I found myself minutes away from signing a contract for a large fancy wedding venue with almost 200+ people. How?! How did this happen?!!

Making BIG LIFE decisions is scary, uncomfortable, and overwhelming. I get it. During these moments, there is nothing wrong with asking for additional support from others but take everything with a grain of salt.

It is important to get back to the basics and scale back. Bring yourself back to the reason WHY you are doing this in the first place. Write a list of what is important to you. Ultimately, what do YOU want?! 

And most importantly, take queues from your body too. Go with your gut. You will feel it when something doesn't feel good to you. Leading up to my decision, I was having nightmares for two weeks. I even had a dream that I was suffocating and woke up in the middle of the night with chest pain. Obviously, something wasn't feeling aligned.

As soon as I reminded myself of what is truly important to me and what motivated my vision in the first place, that's when I got clarity .. and all the fear/stress was released. So whether you are planning to design your dream home or the wedding of your desires, get clear on your vision and the reason why you are starting in the first place.


As I conclude this personal story, I would love to hear from you!

Please comment below if :

  • You planned a wedding before: do you relate to being overwhelmed/influenced by other people's opinions?
  • You are planning a decorating project and you are losing sight of what you want
  • Did you enjoy this post? Leave a comment below. Comments make me smile and it gives me insight on what posts you enjoy!

Do you know someone planning a wedding or renovation? Share this with a friend.